Month: December 2020

Hanging on by an edge

I’m a woman full of emotions. My Sir can probably vouch for that. I think he sees most of my personality within knowing me in just 7 days – sexually frustrated me, angry and tearful me or when I’m being bratty and challenging him (or when I get this sudden burst of emotions and just so excited that my Sir is here :p). There are times when I freaked out too, like tonight, because of an unavoidable situation, and I asked him to go and find a better slut because I’m a huge mess of a person.Sir said something surprising yet comforting at the same time too:I won’t consider that until I complete break you and make you the perfect little slut. And, seeing as how you’re freaking out, I won’t punish you for this negative thought. I’m not shallow. I’m not leaving just because of a few bad days.As someone new in this orgasm denial and edging thing, I don’t really know how this dynamic works, but Sir makes it fun. He gives me choices. He respects my decision. He breaks me slowly. He makes me feel addicted to this feeling. He encourages me to be true to myself, and try to stop hiding. He makes this whole thing enjoyable, and I appreciate the fact that he doesn’t take advantage of me.He lets me takes my time with things I’m not familiar with. He’s not soft, but rather firm with his decisions and knows how to drive me wild with this unthinkable needs to constantly stay on the edge. Ahhh, I wonder if I would ever find another Sir like him.That’s for the future.For now…Sir made me choose something. He would count down from 50, and when it ends, I can either choose to have a full orgasm, a ruin, or straight up a denial.I might think he was joking if it wasn’t because of the seriousness of the situation. And I thought long and hard about it. He asked me to record it, and showed him what I chose. Within 50 seconds, I chose to stay in denial.I wanted that orgasm too, but for some reason, I chose that. A tiny bit of me was scared Sir would be disappointed if I chose my own pleasure, and that was when he said that he will NOT be disappointed, no matter what I choose (someone listen to me ‘fangirling’ please, he’s the kind of Sir that anyone would love to have).Thus, another last chance for tonight. He asked me to do the same thing again, for 1 minute this time, and again, he said, “I give you permission.” I already have his permission to cum, and the submissive in me STILL chose to be denied. Again.Only this time my mind wasn’t filled with any doubts. I denied myself of my own orgasm. It wasn’t even Sir’s command. It was my own wish. I chose not to orgasm, not to ruin, but to stay on the very edge of both. I’ve worked so hard to be where I am now, and it feels like such a waste to let all of them go after just a week of denial.A full week of denial. Oh wow. Where did I even get that courage from? I couldn’t even deny myself that long before. Okay shhh it IS long time for me, for someone who never gets past a day before. So I can confidently say I’m proud of that small progress.Though fucking my ass isn’t a small progress :pA week of denial and oh boy, I’ve already did so many things.Edging non stop to porn.Listening to Cal’s curse for the whole night.Listening to lesbian porn on the drive back home from work.Starting to regularly wearing no bra and panties.Edging constantly at work – in the bathroom and on my office desk.Humping both of my plushie and my office desk too.Ass training.ASS TRAINING. Sorry, this deserves to be said twice :p (& hooray! I can comfortably fit in a finger now!)Punished for thinking negatively about my own body. Not even spanks (and spanking is pleasurable for me), but I have to use a rubber band on my clit.Learnt that ruins can be so fucking pleasurable.No touch is no fun. But it does serve its purpose – turning me into Sir’s obedient slut who would do everything and anything just to earn that one small touch (but I need to stop being hella bratty ha ha ha)Me: Thank you for being proud of me.Sir: Thank you, for being a mindbroken, obedient little slut. female orgasm denial Get your own Orgasm Control toys: For men: http://www.amzn.to/1V6XQvv For women: https://ift.tt/1UWn54n

My current state

Peppermint oil on each nipple. No panties. Legs open, bent at the knees. One steel nipple clamp, interchanging between nipples. Massage and pinch nipple without clamp, then switch. Not allowed to touch between my legs. Have to ask: how would you tease and torment the little clitty that’s screaming for attention right now?Please make me wet. Sir says I need to make a puddle. female orgasm denial Get your own Orgasm Control toys: For men: http://www.amzn.to/1V6XQvv For women: https://ift.tt/1UWn54n