(F30) Self-denying without husband knowing

I’ve been doing this since the beginning of October. It was really hard at first because I just desperately wanted to ride him, but I knew in those first weeks that if I did, I would fail. Instead, I’ve been sucking his dick at every opportunity and just letting the smell and taste of him get me wet. It has made me such a thirsty, desperate slut. I ordered new toys (clit pincher and anal beads), I edge every time I’m in the bathroom, I often close my legs and make those soft humping motions at my desk; it’s gotten pretty intense. I only ever touch myself ABOVE the clothes.In the past week, I’ve gotten confident enough that when he wanted to fuck me, I let him. I let him use my pussy like a sex toy. I tried to thinking of myself like one of those blow-up dolls or a life-sided onahole, but more active. As soon as he was inside me, it was difficult not to break. I had to take a deep breath in and just slowly let it out all while acting like I normally would during sex. I pretended to climax while he filled me with his cum and as soon as it was over I ran off to the bathroom to eat it out of myself and edge a couple more times.I’ve tried once before to communicate to him that I want this, that I want to be a needy, always-ready fucktoy for his pleasure, but he couldn’t get into it. This time I have no intention to tell him, but instead to become a better actress and sex doll for him on my own. Wish me luck! female orgasm denial Get your own Orgasm Control toys: For men: http://www.amzn.to/1V6XQvv For women: https://ift.tt/1UWn54n